Yan grass shimmers like silken jade.
Qin mulberry trees' green leaves droop.
Your homecoming is now at hand
As heartbreak has me thin and stooped.
Spring Winds and I are strangers --
Why, past my curtains, the inward swoop?
Chinese Title: 春思; Original poem in Simplified Chinese:
燕草如碧丝， 秦桑低绿枝；
当君怀归日， 是妾断肠时。
春风不相识， 何事入罗帏？
Note: this is poem #7 in “300 Tang Poems” [唐诗三百首]
I don’t think that’s a question I can meaningfully answer. I think each person has more confidence and courage in some dimensions of life than in others. A given observer tends to see the person who is the most confident in the areas in which that observer is least confident and think of that person as the most confident — when that person might be quite lacking in confidence in areas to which the observer isn’t being attentive.
It was eye opening to read about Audie Murphy, a man who won the Congressional Medal of Honor for single-handedly taking on a unit of Nazis, a man who had a successful career in film, but also a man who was said to have been tremendously shy and awkward around strangers. It would be all in the context in which one saw Murphy that might make one think he was the most or least confident person around.
Quite frankly, the person who appears the most confident in all aspects of life is probably also the most full of shit.
Feel them, but don’t feed them. By that I mean take time to be aware of the feelings, but do not let the mind go into its default mode of fixation upon the object informing these sensations and worst-case scenario building. Give the feelings your attention but recognize that you influence your experience of the world and don’t give the mind free reign to build an illusory scenario that it accepts as its reality. (i.e. Remember what Mark Twain said, “I’ve had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened.”)
The biggest problem with negative feelings is that the go-to modern strategy is attempted distraction (by vice, by entertainment, by activity, etc.) this leads the body to turn up the heat. If you give the sensations your attention without adding value judgements, it becomes impossible to obsess. For yoga practitioners who’ve done Yoga Nidra (Yogic sleep) the experience will be familiar. One often begins by being attentive to sounds, by giving the sounds attention without judgement, your mind starts to lose interest and it becomes harder for those sounds to distract you throughout the practice. This approach to negative feelings is much the same.
Also, breathwork that extends the exhalation component of breath will shift the balance toward rest and digest activity.
Ultimately, realize that these feelings are just sensations your body and brain use to turn your attention in certain directions. They have no more power than that, other than what one grants them. They are not identical to — or inextricably linked with — the events of the world that triggered them, and — therefore — you get to be the master of, and not the slave to, your feelings.
The next time you find yourself getting bogged down by a negative feeling, give the feeling a minute or two of pure undivided attention, and then think, “This is a wonderful opportunity to learn how my body and mind work.” See what happens.
Sans fear of dying,
The angst of trying
Is felt and left
To float.
The Bustle in a House
The Morning after Death
Is solemnest of industries
Enacted opon Earth --
The Sweeping up the Heart
And putting Love away
We shall not want to use again
Until Eternity --
Sorrow like a ceaseless rain
Beats upon my heart.
People twist and scream in pain, --
Dawn will find them still again;
This has neither wax nor wane,
Neither stop nor start.
People dress and go to town;
I sit in my chair.
All my thoughts are slow and brown:
Standing up or sitting down
Little matters, or what gown
Or what shoes I wear.
What’s the thing you’re most scared to do? What would it take to get you to do it?
Going to a cocktail party with no one I know in attendance. FYI —Things that would generate less anxiety include: cage-fighting, gator-wrestling, skydiving, and (admittedly with the appearance of irony) giving a speech to a large audience.
A battle-hardened phalanx with pointy sticks.
Cruelty has a Human Heart,
And Jealousy a Human Face;
Terror the Human Form Divine,
And Secrecy the Human Dress.
The Human Dress is forged Iron,
The Human Form a fiery Forge,
The Human Face a Furnace seal'd,
The Human Heart its hungry Gorge.
The crescent moon hangs on a barren tree.
The water clock has stopped and all is still.
Who sees the sad man pace the shore alone?
His shadow slants and curls into a swan.
The startled man stiffens and turns to look;
His grief remains unseen by anyone.
He passes on a seat of fallen log,
And plops down on the wet and cold sandbank.
NOTE: The original title is: 卜算子.
1.) Changing my mind. This wouldn’t be noteworthy except that there seems to be a stigma attached to adults changing their minds about a thing (even in the face of new, better, or first -time information.) It’s considered “wishy-washy.”
2.) Learning. I love learning and I devote a lot of time to it. Beyond youth, a skill for it requires a capacity for what Shunryu Suzuki called “beginner’s mind” — a state a lot of people seem to run from, rather than toward.
3.) Adopting another’s point of view. Truth be told, I wouldn’t really say I’m good at this, but the bar is quite low.
4.) Operating my body.
5.) Going the places that scare me.
NOTE: I thought I was better at humility, but the fact that I’m willing to answer the question speaks to the contrary.
Tiger Riding for Beginners 