PROMPT: Fear and Self-Doubt

Daily writing prompt
How do you handle fear and self-doubt?

Feel it but don’t feed it. I feel whatever emotional sensation it brings with my whole attention, but don’t ruminate — i.e. don’t let the mind go into worst-case scenario building or pity partying or self-criticism. Use the sensation as an anchor for one’s awareness. This honors the source of consternation while recognizing that one’s mental (/ emotional) experience of an event is not the event, itself — i.e. that one has influence over one’s experience even when one has zero influence over the event. Gain confidence with the small emotional experiences and work toward the big ones.

This was the great gift I received in being taught sakshi bhava, the yogic practice of dispassionate witnessing.

PROMPT: Question Reality

Daily writing prompt
What’s a moment that made you question reality?

I have them all the time. When I was actively working on lucid dreaming / dream yoga, I was particularly attuned to them (as the practice necessitates.) The most common instance is when one sees something in one’s environs that one has never noticed before. It would happen all the time when I was living in Bangalore because it was such a visually chaotic and rapidly changing place that I could walk down a street ten times and not notice an unusual sign or building facade, and then — POW! — the moment I saw it I was in utter disbelief that it could have been their all the time.

I haven’t discounted (nor accepted) the simulation hypothesis, and I suspect whatever the world is, it’s not precisely any of the things we’ve thought it to be.

PROMPT: Expected to Hate

Daily writing prompt
What’s a movie you expected to hate but ended up loving?

I’ve had it the other way round (i.e. disliked a movie I expected to like,) but I can’t really say I’ve ever watched a movie that I expected to hate. Do people do that? In the very short life one has, are there people who sit around entertaining themselves with movies they expect to not be entertaining? Despite all that I have learned in this life, people perplex me more and more each day.

PROMPT: Meaning of Life

Daily writing prompt
What is the meaning of life?

I don’t know that there is a meaning of life, and — if there is — I truly doubt that it’s one size fits all. I’ve got to give it to the Existentialists on this particular question.

PROMPT: Word or Phrase

Daily writing prompt
What’s a word or phrase that annoys you?

Popularity contest,” as in “This isn’t going to win me any popularity contests, but…” You know what’s not popular? Popularity contests. I’ve never heard of one. What you are really saying is, “I’m about to be a jackass, and I just want you to know that I’m aware I’m being a jackass.” Just own your jackassery all ready. You can’t soften the blow of being a jackass.

PROMPT: Perfect Road Trip

Daily writing prompt
How do you plan the perfect road trip?

As loosely and flexibly as your stress tolerance will bear.

PROMPT: Stronger

Daily writing prompt
What’s a moment that made you realize you were stronger than you thought?

Many times. In many ways. Not always good. One time in a packed conference room for a mandatory graduate seminar, I realized I’d forgot to wear deodorant on an Indian summer day in Georgia, and — thus — smelled stronger than I’d thought. (Maybe, I’d put on the deodorant, but it — being as exhausted as I — hadn’t the will to stay in the fight.) Of course, when I first caught a whiff, my internal monologue was like, “Oh man, who skipped the shower!” But after a couple pit sniffs made as surreptitiously as I could manage, there was no lying to myself further. (No lying about the smell, and no lying to myself that pretending to wipe my lip on my collar was really any less gross than just owning the sniffing my own pit.) I — on that occasion — was the stinky kid.

PROMPT: Simple Pleasure

Daily writing prompt
What’s a simple pleasure in life that brings you joy?

A breath of air.

PROMPT: Erase

Daily writing prompt
If you could erase one movie from your memory and watch it again for the first time, which one would it be?

If Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind taught us anything, it’s that one shouldn’t go around erasing memories. So, I decline to answer. [FYI: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind is not my answer because I don’t need the lesson all over again.]

PROMPT: Motivated

Daily writing prompt
How do you stay motivated when learning something new?

That’s not so much my problem. I’m a learning addict and get hooked easily. My problem comes down the line at the point where the once blurred edges between what is of value and what is bullshit in a given discipline comes into focus. It is that point that my enthusiasm wavers.