There once was a lazy sales clerk who didn’t want clients to think her a jerk. The solution, you see, was the airport duty-free, where there’d be no obligation to work. [And the salary would be a nice perq.]
Duty-Free Limerick
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Category Archives: humor
Food for Thought [Voltaire & Smartphones]
When Voltaire said:
“Once a nation begins to think, it is impossible to stop it.”
I don’t think he’d anticipated smartphones.
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Charleston Limerick
There was a Bible-thumping lady from Charleston who, in her views, was no less than puritan. She tried to ban books she hadn't given a look because, like "Moby Dick," the titles were smut-ridden.
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Huế Limerick
There was a bike-rick driver in Huế always honked at for being in the way. He took loads fit for a truck, drove 'em crosstown for a buck, and got their faster by using the expressway.
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Zambia Limerick
There was a shrewd carpenter from Zambia dismayed to hear what was paid to IKEA. He took apart his shelves, said, "Make 'em yourselves!" upped his rates, but threw in a hex key-a.
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Beijing Limerick
There was a bureaucrat from old Beijing who claimed that COVID was in a downswing, "It must be, you see, for it cannot be the rules changed cause of shouts of "Can Xi Jinping!"
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Vienna Limerick
There was a famed therapist from Vienna who knew the source of all angst and each dilemma. "Sexy thoughts of your mom made you fear the A-bomb!" "Uh, it started last week when I fell from an antenna."
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Cambridge U. Limerick
When Lord Byron lived at Cambridge University, he greatly increased campus diversity. He lived with a bear. They were quite the pair. For the poet, the dog ban was a perversity.
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Bad Parenting [Common Meter]
I don't mean to cast aspersions, but it would seem to me parents shouldn't give a child stabby things 'fore the age of three. I don't know whether this household has a pup or kitty, but if the kid can spear the floor the pets ain't look'n pretty. Saying a babe shouldn't have a spear, you'll call me "left-wing nut," but I don't like dog-on-a-stick: even if it's a mutt.
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Socratic Method [Clerihew]
Beloved teacher, Socrates won each debate with great ease. The first of his winning suggestions? Ask [don't answer] all the questions.
Tiger Riding for Beginners 