There was a lantern maker from Hoi An
known for being a brilliant craftsman.
So increased his fame,
'til his shop burst in flames,
and they called for a paper lantern ban.
The philosopher named Diogenes
was like a dog... known to have fleas.
-failed to find an honest man.
-didn't let "Greatness" block his tan.
But he lived simply, and as he pleased.
There was a burglar from Valladolid
who could burgle with great grace and speed.
he broke into the sacristy
with much alacrity,
but was dog-chased out of the church and treed.
A tourist who traveled to Goa
contracted some mean protozoa.
Claimed she got it in a cave,
but "more likely at a rave,"
said those who recall that girl from Goa.
There was an old woman from Germany
who went to the bank to get her money.
"It may seem quite strange,
but I'll take it in change.
I buy vending machine sausage when there's urgency."
An exhibitionist girl from Frankfurt
loved dearly to beguile and to flirt.
When she raised her hem,
her teacher said, "Ahem!
that's now more of a belt than a skirt."
A multiethnic gourmand of Bratislava
liked to go downstairs for a hot java,
then over to Hungary
for torte topped with berry,
and on to Vienna for a slice of baklava.
There was a man with a fondness for beer.
There was nothing else that he held so dear.
Beer-goggles were his Cupid,
& beerplugs muted his stupid:
though it remained for the plugless to hear.
A girl got herself an intrepid beau,
but she'd long owned a vibrating dildo.
"That thing has three speeds
to exceed her base needs
I'll need four, none too quick nor too slow."
A grouchy nitwit wrote a polemic
about how Yetis had caused the Pandemic.
The Yetis protested,
and kindly requested
the man ponder head-in-ass hygienics.