To fight aloud, is very brave --
But gallanter, I know
Who charge within the bosom
The Calvary of Wo --
Who win, and nations do not see --
Who fall -- and none observe --
Whose dying eyes, no Country
Regards with patriot love --
We trust, in plumed procession
For such, the Angels go --
Rank after Rank, with even feet --
And Uniforms of snow.
"Time to put off the world and go somewhere
And find my health again in the sea air,"
Beggar to beggar cried, being frenzy-struck,
"And make my soul before my pate is bare;
"And get a comfortable wife and house
To rid me of the devil in my shoes,"
Beggar to beggar cried, being frenzy-struck,
"And the worse devil that is between my thighs.
"And though I'd marry with a comely lass,
She need not be too comely -- let it pass,"
Beggar to beggar cried, being frenzy-struck,
"But there's a devil in a looking glass.
"Nor should she be too rich, because the rich
Are driven by wealth as beggars by the itch,"
Beggar to beggar cried, being frenzy-struck,
"And cannot have a humorous happy speech.
"And there I'll grow respected at my ease,
And hear amid the garden's nightly peace,"
Beggar to beggar cried, being frenzy-struck,
"The wind-blown clamor of the barnacle-geese."
I saw a snake had made a gnarly bed --
On logs and stones, its length did curl and thread.
Ah, to be comfy on bark's ragged bumps...
I wake up when PJ's wad to a lump.
I came upon a Lion-tailed Macaque,
And was instantly taken aback.
Sure, its tail was lion-like, but what's weird
Is that namers didn't call upon that beard!
Orangutans live their lives in the trees.
The jungle has as many as they please --
But - with trees - the Zoo is quite sparing,
Leaving just one twig: non-loadbearing.
The Egyptians found the Ibis sacred.
This must have made the Ibis elated.
I watched one try to push a Heron around;
The unimpressed Heron just stood its ground.
Thirty-year-old man buys same-aged tortoise;
Middle-aged tortoise: owner has rigor mortis.
In retrospect, it was a stupid plan;
Clearly, the tortoise should have bought the man.
You may think the wolf is all howl --
Interspersed with gravelly growls,
But unlike the dog's nightly riots,
Wolves are remarkably quiet.
Just listen now to the Ring-Tailed Lemur:
It purrs, howls, and squeaks - but ain't no screamer.
And they're not the kind to rely on might,
But wave smelly tails to have a Stink Fight.
He thought he saw an Elephant,
That practised on a fife:
He looked again, and found it was
A letter from his wife.
"At length I realize," he said,
"The bitterness of Life!"
He thought he saw a Buffalo
Upon the chimney-piece:
He looked again, and found it was
His Sister's Husband's Niece,
"Unless you leave this house," he said,
"I'll send for the Police!"
He thought he saw a Rattlesnake
That questioned him in Greek:
He looked again, and found it was
The Middle of Next Week.
"The one thing I regret," he said,
"Is that it cannot speak!"
He thought he saw a Banker's Clerk
Descending from the 'bus:
He looked again, and found it was
A Hippopotamus.
"If this should stay to dine," he said,
"There won't be much for us!"
He thought he saw a Kangaroo
That worked a coffee-mill:
He looked again, and found it was
A Vegetable-Pill.
"Were I to swallow this," he said,
"I should be very ill!"
He thought he saw a Coach-and-Four
That stood beside his bed:
He looked again, and found it was
A Bear without a Head.
"Poor thing," he said, "poor silly thing!
It's waiting to be fed!"
He thought he saw an Albatross
That fluttered round the lamp:
He looked again, and found it was
A Penny-Postage-Stamp.
"You'd best be getting home," he said,
"The nights are very damp!"
He thought he saw a Garden-Door
That opened with a key:
He looked again, and found it was
A Double Rule of Three:
"And all its mystery," he said,
"Is clear as day to me!"
He thought he saw an Argument
That proved he was the Pope:
He looked again, and found it was
A Bar of Mottled Soap.
"A fact so dread," he faintly said,
"Extinguishes all hope!"
Tiger Riding for Beginners 