What makes a good neighbor?
Neither a borrower, nor a lender be… plus, has good judgment about when to call the cops.
PROMPT: Neighbor
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Tag Archives: Relationships
BOOKS; “Rental Person Who Does Nothing” by Shoji Morimoto
Rental Person Who Does Nothing by Shoji MorimotoMy rating: 5 of 5 stars
Publisher Site — Harper Collins
This quirky little book is the memoir of a man who formed a business lending himself out as “rental person who does nothing.” At the time the book came out, Morimoto did this without charging his “customers” anything except travel expenses and any food and beverages consumed as part of the activity in question. [As I understand it, he eventually began charging a per session fee ($85 USD at the time of the 2022 BBC piece on him that I watched.)] The book does discuss Morimoto’s thoughts about how to charge (i.e. hourly or per session,) how much to charge, whether to find a different financing model (e.g. sponsorship or patronage,) and why he ultimately rejected them all (at least for a time.) In fact, the whole penultimate chapter (ch. 4) is about the economics of his business.
The most interesting aspect of the book is the psychological insight on offer. The first question that arises is why people would use a stranger for these activities, and not a friend. One might jump to the conclusion that the people who use his service have no friends, but this is generally wrong. There are a number of reasons why people who have friends use his service. First, many times friends can’t just sit and listen empathetically, but rather they have to try to solve the problem. This can be irritating because it is often dismissive of the challenges confronting the other person. But also, as Morimoto points out, it also creates a hierarchy (a top dog) in what would otherwise be a co-equal relationship. A fascinating second factor pointed out by the author is that adults, unlike children, rarely have general-purpose friends. Adults, instead, have contextual friends. So, if one wants to engage in an activity that is outside the domain of one’s contextual (work, bar, hobby, etc.) friendship, it might not be easy. There are many other psychological insights relating to what people ask him to do, the issue of reciprocity, and what Morimoto defines as “doing nothing” for the purposes of this business.
I found this quick and simple book to be packed with insights into human nature, and I’d highly recommend it for readers interested in what makes people tick.
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PROMPT: Personality Trait
Dogmatic thinking and the humor blindspots that correspond.
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PROMPT: Good Life
Daily writing prompt
What are the most important things needed to live a good life?
Right mind, healthy body, and good company.
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PROMPT: Friend
What quality do you value most in a friend?
The ability to converse intelligently on a wide range of subjects.
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“Are you the new person drawn toward me?” by Walt Whitman [w/ Audio]
Are you the new person drawn toward me?
To begin with, take warning, I am surely far
different from what you suppose;
Do you suppose you will find in me your
ideal?
Do you think it so easy to have me become
your lover?
Do you think the friendship of me would
be unalloy'd satisfaction?
Do you think I am trusty and faithful?
Do you see no further than this facade,
this smooth and tolerant manner of me?
Do you suppose yourself advancing on real
ground toward a real heroic man?
Have you no thought, O dreamer, that is
may be all maya, illusion?
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“I Sing the Body Electric” [4 of 9] by Walt Whitman [w/ Audio]
I have perceiv'd that to be with those l like
is enough,
To stop in company with the rest at evening
is enough,
To be surrounded by beautiful, curious,
breathing, laughing flesh is enough,
To pass among them or touch any one, or
rest my arm ever so lightly round his or
her neck for a moment, what is this then?
I do not ask any more delight, I swim in it
as in a sea.
There is something in staying close to men
and women and looking on them, and in
the contact and odor of them, that
pleases the soul well,
All things please the soul, but these please
the soul well.
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“A Poison Tree” by William Blake [w/ Audio]
I was angry with my friend;
I told my wrath, my wrath did end.
I was angry with my foe:
I told it not, my wrath did grow.
And I watered it in fears,
Night & morning with my tears:
And I sunned it with smiles,
And with soft deceitful wiles.
And it grew both day and night.
Till it bore an apple bright.
And my foe beheld it shine,
And he knew that it was mine.
And into my garden stole,
When the night had veild the pole;
In the morning glad I see;
My foe outstretched beneath the tree.
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PROMPT: Don’t Understand
I’ve often been surprised how little intuitive grasp people have of basic mathematical or statistical ideas or relationships, even when they have had the education to understand with a little effort.
One example of this is what I call “unilateral mathematics” where people fixate on one term or side of an equation while ignoring that changing a term changes the equation’s other side (or to keep the other side static, something else has to give.) For example, I hear people getting so excited by the new salary they will earn when they move to a new place. Then they get to the new locale only to find that the cost of living is so much higher that even their hefty pay boost supports only a diminished quality of life. One sees this tendency a great deal in people’s policy discussions when someone will say, “just set a maximum (or minimum) price” without understanding that shortages or surpluses will come along for the ride. [The Law of Unintended Consequences is another good answer to this prompt.]
We all saw flaws in statistical thinking during the pandemic when people said things like, “See, she got the vaccine and then she got COVID, so obviously the vaccine doesn’t work!” I’m convinced this is because people don’t have good intuition for statistical thinking and — instead — they want to treat a low probability as an impossibility and a high probability as a certainty.
By the way, you see this from people of all persuasions, including those who are highly educated, conservatives, progressives, believers, atheists, etc. One can see the universality of the flaw most commonly in climate change comments. You’ll hear one person say, “See, it’s the hottest day on record, that’s evidence global warming is real!” Another person will say, “See, it’s the coldest day on record, global warming is obviously hokum!” Somehow, even with diametrically opposed viewpoints, these two manage to both be wrong because one day’s WEATHER is not instructive of what is happening to the CLIMATE. In other words, a sample of one provides no insight into state changes in the population. [Maybe it’s more appropriate to use Wolfgang Pauli’s terms and say the two are “not even wrong.”]
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You, Too [Lyric Poem]
I cannot be one.
I cannot be lost.
I cannot buy my entry
at a payable cost.
I cannot be three.
I cannot be boss.
I cannot isolate: diamonds
from the dross.
I think I can be two,
just the me & you.
our two could be one,
like two planks form a cross.
Tiger Riding for Beginners 