What’s something most people don’t know about you?
I’m a genius. I know everybody always says, “If nobody recognizes your genius, you’re not a genius,” but…. [I can’t really think of a rebuttal, seems airtight, now that I think about it.]
Do lazy days make you feel rested or unproductive?
Rested. Like Mondays, they never get me down. [Or is that “rainy days?”]
When you think of the word “successful,” who’s the first person that comes to mind and why?
Ron Burgundy, because he’s a legend, and the legend continues.
What makes a good neighbor?
Neither a borrower, nor a lender be… plus, has good judgment about when to call the cops.
What could you try for the first time?
My problem is that I’m old enough that all the low hanging fruit has been consumed, meaning most “first times” involve a serious time investment. For example, I’d love to go skydiving, but you can’t just jump out of a plane, you have to either watch a safety video or sabotage a plane. All for a five-minute experience. And if you don’t want to do it with a stranger strapped intimately close to you, you need to do probably watch several safety videos and practice pulling a cord over and over again. [Question: They sometimes ask if you’d like a male or female massage therapist when you get a massage, but I’ve never heard of being given the option when tandem skydiving. How come it’s ok to be homophobic, or hetero-phobic, in one instance, but not the other? Just asking.]
There once was a man from Austria
prone to coffee house nausea.
“Our cafés are held dear,
but I can’t go near…”
said that lonely, skinny man of Austria.
Tiger Riding for Beginners 