Lizard [Lyric Poem]

Ah! What a life, to be a lizard:
Unacquainted with ice or blizzard,
Knowing only warmth and beaches...
All but for sand in one's nether reaches.

Crab [Lyric Poem]

Not sure whether to call the crab "monstrous," 
Or, rather, to class it "preposterous?"
Claw outsized, staggering like drunken ants,
If I saw one dog-sized, I'd crap my pants.

“The Bridge” by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow [w/ Audio]

I stood on the bridge at midnight,
As the clocks were striking the hour,
And the moon rose o’er the city,
Behind the dark church-tower.

I saw her bright reflection
In the waters under me,
Like a golden goblet filling
And sinking into the sea.

And far in the hazy distance
Of that lovely night in June,
The blaze of the flaming furnace
Gleamed redder than the moon.

Among the long, black rafters
The wavering shadows lay,
And the current that came from the ocean
Seemed to lift and bear them away;

As, sweeping and eddying through them,
Rose the belated tide,
And, streaming into the moonlight,
The seaweed floated wide.

And like those waters rushing
Among the wooden piers,
A flood of thoughts came o'er me
That filled my eyes with tears.

How often, O, how often,
In the days that had gone by,
I had stood on that bridge at midnight
And gazed on that wave and sky!

How often, O, how often,
I had wished that the ebbing tide
Would bear me away on its bosom
O'er the ocean wild and wide!

For my heart was hot and restless,
And my life was full of care,
And the burden laid upon me
Seemed greater than I could bear.

But now it has fallen from me,
It is buried in the sea;
And only the sorrow of others
Throws its shadow over me.

Yet whenever I cross the river
On its bridge with wooden piers,
Like the odor of brine from the ocean
Comes the thought of other years.

And I think how many thousands
Of care-encumbered men,
Each bearing his burden of sorrow,
Have crossed the bridge since then.

I see the long procession
Still passing to and fro,
The young heart hot and restless,
And the old subdued and slow!

And forever and forever,
As long as the river flows,
As long as the heart has passions,
As long as life has woes;

The moon and its broken reflection
And its shadows shall appear,
As the symbol of love in heaven,
And its wavering image here.

Giraffe Headbutts [Lyric Poem]

I was warned giraffes like to give headbutts.
I told the man, "You must be nuts!
Even if true, my head 's far too low."

"That's why we built a tower, now up you go!"
Tower built at the Giraffe Centre to put humans at headbutt level.

Warthog [Lyric Poem]

Given that "warts" and "hogs" are both unloved,
Why not prybar letters, together shoved?
A well-placed dash might do the trick,
Would "War-Thog" sound too sci-fi bombastic?

“They shut me up in Prose–” (445) by Emily Dickinson [w/ Audio]

They shut me up in Prose --
As when a little Girl
They put me in the Closet --
Because they liked me "still" --

Still! Could themself have peeped --
And seen my Brain -- go round --
They might as wise have lodged a Bird
For Treason -- in the Pound --

Himself has but to will
And easy as a Star
Look down opon Captivity --
And laugh -- No more have I --

Marmot [Lyric Poem]

I came across a chubby marmot
In some puffed up outer garment.
A fur coat over its furry coat?
Or mainlining from the gravy boat?

“Fulani Creation Myth” by Anonymous [w/ Audio]

At the beginning there was a huge drop of milk.
Then Doondari came and he created the stone.
Then the stone created iron;
And iron created fire;
And fire created water;
And water created air.
Then Doondari descended the second time.
And he took the five elements
And he shaped them into man.
But man was proud.
Then Doondari created blindness,
and blindness defeated man.
But when blindness became too proud,
Doondari created sleep,
and sleep defeated blindness;
But when sleep became too proud,
Doondari created worry,
and worry defeated sleep;
But when worry became too proud,
Doondari created death,
and death defeated worry.
But then death became too proud,
Doondari descended for the third time,
And he came as Gueno, the eternal one.
And Gueno defeated death.

NOTE: The Fulani (also known as Fula and Fulbe) are a West African herding tribe that live in Mali, Niger, Nigeria, Guinea, and Senegal.

Red Panda [Lyric Poem]

The Red Panda: more red than Panda Bear --
I'll grant you similarity of facial hair.
Why is it not "the Ginger Raccoon?"
Too much like a bamboo-eating Irish buffoon?

“I’m Happy to Be a Free Yogi” by Drukpa Kunley [w/ Audio]

I'm happy to be a free Yogi,
growing evermore into inner happiness.

I can have sex with many women
as it helps them find the path of liberation.

Outwardly I'm a fool
and inwardly I live a clear spiritual path.

Outwardly I enjoy wine and women
and inwardly I work for the benefit of all beings.

Outwardly I live for my pleasure
and inwardly I do everything in the right moment.

Outwardly I'm a ragged beggar
and inwardly a blissful Buddha.