Our closest relative, the Chimpanzee
Lacks our affinity to be fancy.
To them we are but pant-wearing buffoons
Who've lost all freedom to shoot the moon.
Chimpanzee [Lyric Poem]
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Tag Archives: humor
Cheetah [Lyric Poem]
A Cheetah can beat a Porsche to a hundred.
(Imagine the tumble if a clumsy one blundered.)
In fact, Cheetah's are so very, very fast
that your future is way, way back in its past.
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Donkey [Lyric Poem]
The Donkey 's known to be a stubborn beast,
But when one won't move - maybe wheels weren't greased.
I've seen angry humans push, pull, and tug,
But never give a peptalk or a hug.
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Pelican [Lyric Poem]
The Pelican, when it has formed a group,
Is said to be a squadron, pouch, or scoop.
I find that naming scheme quite puzzling;
Isn't its "pouch" where it keeps soup for guzzling?
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Snake [Lyric Poem]
I saw a snake had made a gnarly bed --
On logs and stones, its length did curl and thread.
Ah, to be comfy on bark's ragged bumps...
I wake up when PJ's wad to a lump.
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“The Bumblebee” by James Whitcomb Riley [w/ Audio]
You better not fool with a Bumblebee!--
Ef you don't think they can sting -- you'll see!
They're lazy to look at, an' kind o' go
Buzzin' an' bummin' aroun' so slow,
An' ac' so slouchy an' all fagged out,
Danglin' their legs as they drone about
The hollyhawks 'at they can't climb in
'Ithout ist a-tumble-un out ag'in!
Wunst I watched one climb clean 'way
In a jimson-blossom, I did, one day,--
An' I ist grabbed it -- an' nen let go--
An' "Ooh-ooh! Honey! I told ye so!"
Says The Raggedy Man; an' he ist run
An' pullt out the stinger, an' don't laugh none,
An' says: "They has be'n folks, I guess,
'At thought I wuz prejudust, more or less, --
Yit I still muntain 'at a Bumblebee
Wears out his welcome too quick fer me!"
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Lion-tailed Macaque [Lyric Poem]
I came upon a Lion-tailed Macaque,
And was instantly taken aback.
Sure, its tail was lion-like, but what's weird
Is that namers didn't call upon that beard!
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Orangutan [Lyric Poem]
Orangutans live their lives in the trees.
The jungle has as many as they please --
But - with trees - the Zoo is quite sparing,
Leaving just one twig: non-loadbearing.
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Tortoise [Lyric Poem]
Thirty-year-old man buys same-aged tortoise;
Middle-aged tortoise: owner has rigor mortis.
In retrospect, it was a stupid plan;
Clearly, the tortoise should have bought the man.
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Ring-Tailed Lemur [Lyric Poem]
Just listen now to the Ring-Tailed Lemur:
It purrs, howls, and squeaks - but ain't no screamer.
And they're not the kind to rely on might,
But wave smelly tails to have a Stink Fight.
Tiger Riding for Beginners 