My conscious mind would only tell lies about this. While I’ve long been aware that I’m an introvert, it’s only more recently come to my attention that I have resting-“get the hell away from me”-face. It’s nothing I ever purposeful cultivated, and — now, being aware of it –I’m trying to be more discerning. (But I have a lot of decades of programming to work against.)
Tell us about a time when you felt out of place.
Only when I’m among people.
Being a traveler who lives abroad, the answer is simple: “Where are you from?”
As a traveler, I can’t grasp tribal / jingoistic people’s obsession with where one fell out of one’s mom, and it always feels a bit xenophobic — as though, noticing one’s foreignness, there is a rush to determine whether one is one of the tolerable foreigners or one of the really bad ones.
As an introvert, the question offends my preference to be talked to by people who have something to say, and to be left alone by people who are just playing out social programming with the objective of breaking silence that they find objectionable (but which I, as a rule, find delightful.) (Even being highly introverted, I can converse for hours with someone who has something to say on a topic that is neither themselves nor me — i.e. I love ideas but hate small talk and interaction for the sake of interaction.)
Plus, it just gets annoying being asked the same question sixty times a day when I’m in more remote parts — a question, the answer to which will be forgotten in three minutes and is merely sound for sound’s sake. In the unlikely event that one hopes to have an actual conversation with me, one must start with something that is not your culture’s default socially programmed question. One must get to at least the second most commonly asked question, a question varies from person to person (in my case, it’s: “Why are you such an asshole?”)
What’s the thing you’re most scared to do? What would it take to get you to do it?
Going to a cocktail party with no one I know in attendance. FYI —Things that would generate less anxiety include: cage-fighting, gator-wrestling, skydiving, and (admittedly with the appearance of irony) giving a speech to a large audience.
A battle-hardened phalanx with pointy sticks.
What’s your dream job?
One that involves interacting with only a small group of familiar people, and which allows for a great deal of deep thought and introspection. (And for the tricky part to reconcile,) one that involves / or allows for a good deal of travel.
For a long time, I’d have said that I’d like to be less introverted. However, adjusting my attitude towards introversion, managing it, and recognizing / valuing the strengths that derive from it has been one of the most enlightening and empowering processes of my life. (So, I’m keeping it.)
However, I do have an ulnar impaction in my wrist that I’d be happy to get rid of (if anyone with such powers is taking requests.)
Turtles sun on pier foundations
at the very edge.
So that upon the merest glance
They can slip the ledge,
And sink down into the pond's depths
To hide amid the murk.
Those who aren't shy can never know
Just how hard is its work.
Oh so many things. My epistemological stance is that one should be ready to drop any belief like a hot rock in the face of better information or better means to understanding.
One of the most fundamental changes is that I used to take for granted that there was a god. Now I’m agnostic about whether there is one, and am virtually certain that – in the unlikely event there is a god – it (she? they? he?) bears no resemblance to any of the tribally derived deities of the various world religions.
I used to think introversion was something that could be, and should be, overcome. Now, I believe the healthy approach is in accepting it and managing one’s life so that it’s not a problem. Truth be told, in my youth, I had a lot of grandiose ideas about what was possible with regards to the mind, ideas which I have jettisoned in favor of one’s that better match the empirical evidence.
I feel out of place in social settings pretty much everywhere and always. This, perhaps surprisingly, has made me an excellent and avid traveler because I feel the same level of out of place among a group of people who speak a different native language, practice an unfamiliar religion, and who have different skin and hair characteristics as I would with a group of people who share a common ancestry, went to the same school, and grew up with the same cultural trappings. This creates an internal pressure to go to unfamiliar places, because familiar places offer the same anxiety with none of the learning opportunities, whereas the unfamiliar always offers new lessons.
of all things for which
“just a little is enough:”
1.) human beings
Tiger Riding for Beginners 