Performed? Not yet. (Unless you count “Crowd Member Milling About [with No Lines] – #7” in an Elementary School Christmas Pageant.) Given a speech? Yes. Unless it is completely impromptu, it is nowhere near the top of my list of horrifying life events.
I never met a one I didn’t like.
1.) Remaining incognito. (I conceal my identity by being no one of interest.)
2.) Calling animals. (They do not come, but I maintain that I'm effective at getting their attention. They give perplexed looks and seem to be thinking, "Why is that dumb-ass human making strange noises?")
3.) Slipping on ice. (It's effortless to me.)
4.) Conveying an air of indifference. (At any given moment, you'd probably conclude that I don't give a shit.)
5.) Eating rotisserie chicken. (It's not pleasant to watch, but I leave not a scrap of meat. It's like a sun-bleached skeleton when I'm done with it.)
I assume just a little more of all the things I already do, with a substantial amount of that time being spent in rest.
The thought, “If I didn’t have to rest I could do so much more” is one of modern life’s most cancerous modes of thinking.
Didn’t we all learn during the pandemic that when commutes and other travel / in-person time obligations go away, life fluidly swells to fill the void. Like having to learn Zoom, etc.
Life gives no free lunches, learn to live with it.
What could you try for the first time?
My problem is that I’m old enough that all the low hanging fruit has been consumed, meaning most “first times” involve a serious time investment. For example, I’d love to go skydiving, but you can’t just jump out of a plane, you have to either watch a safety video or sabotage a plane. All for a five-minute experience. And if you don’t want to do it with a stranger strapped intimately close to you, you need to do probably watch several safety videos and practice pulling a cord over and over again. [Question: They sometimes ask if you’d like a male or female massage therapist when you get a massage, but I’ve never heard of being given the option when tandem skydiving. How come it’s ok to be homophobic, or hetero-phobic, in one instance, but not the other? Just asking.]
What is your favorite hobby or pastime?
Swimming, at the moment.
Pie eating. I don't mean to be gluttonous about it, but I seldom eat a proper piece of pie. I'd say I get enough dessert, overall, but perhaps need to shift more of the balance of dessert in the direction of pie. Or maybe I just have a momentary hankering for pie, and this is all just meaningless rambles. I do not intend to build a pie-eating action plan, so things will probably remain as they are on the pie-eating front.
How often do you walk or run?
Daily. I don’t live in an aquarium (thus allowing swimming as the predominant mode of transport,) nor am I a potted plant that stays where I’m set. Also, flying is out of the question, except in an airplane.
Haphazardly with a side of slapdashery.
Tiger Riding for Beginners 