There was a crotchety old luddite who smashed all technology on sight... 'til he needed Google to look up "centrifugal" else it'd be the bus to the library at night.
Luddite Limerick
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Tag Archives: Limerick
The Optimist [Limerick]
A man laid down with a wound to the head. The doctor claimed he was already dead. "It's really not so bad. This one time I had two swords in my brain," the optimist said.
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The Skepticism-less Skeptic [Limerick]
The philosopher, René Descartes, said, "I'll doubt everything, just to start." but once he "proved" God, what are the odds, the wheels rolled off his skeptical cart.
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Astronomical Fail [Limerick]
The astronomer Francesco Sizzi worked himself into a tizzy: "More rocks in space? There're seven holes in a face! Pssh! Galileo calls himself scientist, but is he?"
Note: When Galileo suggested Jupiter had moons, Sizzi summarily rejected the idea based on the “rationale” that there couldn’t be more than seven natural satellites because there are seven holes in a mammal’s head, seven days in a week, and [somehow] seven metals… ergo, seven astronomical bodies, maximum.
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Ancestral Mathematics Limerick
A scholar who loved precise specificity was asked about his exact ethnicity. "That very much depends how far back one extends: I'm seven-eighths Brit, but all Kenyan - for simplicity."
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Strangler Fig Limerick
There was a man who lived in the jungle -oh! A fig took root in the roof of his bungalow. 'Twas a spotless hut, 'til the door grew shut, and the place was overcome by a fungal growth.
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Dream Limerick
There was a retiree named Graham who dreamt he was unprepared for an exam. "What a dream, you fool! You're sixty years out of school, and still have an impulse to cram!"
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Hypnotic Limerick
A hypnotic subject entered a trance, then clucked like a chicken and danced. "I didn't even ask you perform these tasks," said the hypnotist, looking askance.
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Metaphysical Limerick
A drunken old idealist philosopher got pulled over by a "pos'lif ossifer." "Oh, can't you see, my true self 's a tree, and you can't justly jail a conifer!"
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Mystic Limerick
A mystic sought to be one with all things, but couldn't make it, allowing no strings, "I'm a little bit torn: one with rose equals thorn, and one with bees invites many a sting."
Tiger Riding for Beginners 